The Unequal Yoke in Marriage

Of all the unequal yokes that the believer can contract that of marriage is the most serious. Other partnerships may be dissolved by mutual consent, but marriage once embarked upon can only rightly be dissolved by the death of one of the contracting parties.

There are certain things we do not need to pray about. If a young man sets his affections on an unbelieving young woman there is no need to ask the Lord if it is His will that the marriage partnership should be contracted. The Scriptures plainly forbid it. “Only in the Lord” (1 Cor. 7:39), is the plain injunction of Scripture. “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers” (2 Cor. 6:14), is equally clear and emphatic.

In such a serious matter the Lord would not draw out the affections of a believer to an unbeliever.

There are instances in Scripture of the folly of a believer marrying an unbeliever. Solomon married an Egyptian princess. We read, “Solomon brought up the daughter of Pharaoh out of the city of David to the house that he had built for her: for he said, My wife shall not dwell in the house of David king of Israel, because the places are holy, whereunto the ark of the Lord has come” (2 Chr. 8:11).

There we have set before us most vividly the folly of the alliance. In the most sacred part of his life she had no part. The wife of his bosom, the companion of special and peculiar intimacy, could not set foot in the holy places of the Lord. Why was that? She was not holy. What an alliance! There was no affinity in matters of the highest importance.

What a tragedy is the unequal yoke in marriage! One partner, to love the Lord. The other, to love the world. One, to walk in the narrow path to life. The other, to travel on the broad road to destruction. Well may the Scriptures ask the questions, “What fellowship has righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion has light with darkness? and what concord has Christ with Belial? or what part has he that believes with an infidel?” that is, “with an unbeliever” (2 Cor. 6:14-15).

But says some young person, “I feel sure my influence will help my partner to be a Christian.” Is that so? Does it work that way? What happened to Solomon? Did he gain over his Egyptian wife? We read, “But king Solomon loved many strange women, together with the daughter of Pharaoh, women of the Moabites, Ammonites, Edomites, Zidonians, and Hittites” (1 Kings 11:1).

He went from bad to worse. His wives influenced him rather than his influencing them. What a contrast to the day when he dedicated the wonderful temple, when the fire of the Lord descended and consumed the sacrifices, and the glory of the Lord filled the house so that the priests could not stand by reason of it. In his old age “his wives turned his heart after other gods.”

God acted in judgment as He must ever do when the believer knowingly infringes Scripture. The kingdom was to be rent from him and given to his servant. The execution of this judgment was delayed, not for Solomon’s sake but for that of his father David.

What of Solomon’s son, his successor on the throne? The unequal yoke is not only the question of marriage, serious as that is, but there is the question of a family. In marriage this is generally looked forward to. “Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is His reward” (Ps. 127:3). Marriage sets in train a good deal that passes beyond our control, and may be bearing fruit generations after we have passed out of this world.

It is said of King Rehoboam, “And his mother’s name was Naamah, an Ammonitess. And he did evil, because he prepared not his heart to seek the Lord” (2 Chr. 12:13-14). He refused the advice of the old men of wisdom, took the counsel of the foolish young men, answered like a blind fool with a mad heart, and lost ten tribes out of twelve. Solomon, the wisest of men, instead of obeying the clear instructions of Scripture, leaned on his own understanding, wrecked his life, and broke up his kingdom, which will never be united till Christ comes to reign. Thus the consequences of his sin comes out in the history of his son to whom he gave a heathen mother. What else could we expect but catastrophe!

What heartaches could be told of these unholy alliances. A Christian young woman was being lovingly warned by a godly minister of the sinfulness of the unequal yoke. He said to her, “Jane, if you marry an unbeliever, you will sup sorrow with a spoon.” After having been married for years, with several children, forsaken and abandoned by her godless husband, in dire need, she reminded him of his warning, and added in bitterness, “Sir, you told me that I should sup sorrow with a spoon; I’ve drunk it in bucketful.” What a warning!

But the plain instruction of Scripture should suffice.